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femgenficathon2009-09-12 10:50 am
verdant-gt.livejournal.com) wrote in femgenficathon2009-09-12 10:50 am
Entry tags:
Dreams are necessity to life [Morgana, PG]
Title: Dreams are necessity to life
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
verdant_gt
Fandom: Merlin
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Prompt: #106: What people say, what people do, and what they say they do are entirely different things. -- Margaret Mead (1901-1978), American anthropologist.
Summary: Morgana reflects on her nightmares and what is the ultimate cause.
Author's Notes: Title is a quote from Anais Nin.
Word Count: 1,111
A scream rent the night air of Camelot Castle as Morgana was locked into another hellish nightmare. This time, it didn't involve Arthur but rather it involved Uther. The dream wasn't showing her death and destruction as was a usual fare. The images flipping through her mind's eye were of robed forms walking toward her with a finger outstretched and accusatory expressions on their faces. Uther was sitting on his throne with a look of disgust as he watched her approach. Her hands were bound in shackles as they had been that time when she openly defied him over Gwen's father, Tom.
"What have you to say for yourself, Morgana?" Uther asked when she approached. "You have been accused of sorcery and crimes against Camelot." His tone told her it was more crimes against him that she was there for.
Morgana frantically looked around her for a sympathetic face but there was none to be found. "I have never lied to you, Sire. Magic is not something one chooses to do. It is within you or it is not. It is the magic wielder and what they do with it that taints, not the magic itself."
"All theses years, Morgana." Uther stood from the throne. "All these years, I've treated you as a daughter. A daughter I never had and this is how you repay me? By never coming to me with this knowledge? By conspiring against your King and Camelot?"
"No, my Lord. Never. They were dreams. That's all they were. I have no control over them. I never knew they were magic until after I heard the dragon's call." Morgana knew that her fate was sealed. She could see it in Uther's eyes, she was already dead.
"Kill her." It was said dispassionately and with a careless toss of his hand.
Morgana began to scream and it was her own screaming that woke her up in a cold sweat. She glanced around her darkened chambers, heart beating frantically against her ribs as a bird trying to escape its cage. It was a dream. She flopped back against her pillow, sleep forever elusive to her once again. Was it something that will happen in the future or was it only her over active imagination? The guilt that she felt for keeping her dreams and fears to herself?
She lay there reliving the dream over and over again until she couldn't stand it any longer and got out of bed. Morgana quickly dressed in a simple gown and hooded cape making sure not to wake Gwen, her lady servant and friend, as she lay sleeping nearby. She quietly made her way out of the castle and down to the stables for a late night ride.
It was in the quiet of the night, under a clear moon, that Morgana searched her soul. Images of her father's death filled her mind. She'd never told a living soul but she'd seen her father's death before Uther had come to their home to tell her she was an orphan. She'd made him tell her details of how he'd died, sure in the knowledge that her dream had been nothing more than a young girl's soul crying at the moment her father's left this world. It hadn't been, of course, for no young girl would know the intimate details of war. No simple child could possibly know exactly how her father had left this Earth yet everything that Uther had said, had happened in her nightmare.
Suspicions had begun to take form when she grew older but Morgana had hid them away. Fear from Uther's distrust and hatred of magic being a prominent reason but also denial. As much as Morgana faced things head on, there were certain things that she refused to face. A chance of being different and magical was certainly high on that list.
It wasn't until Mordred came to Camelot that she'd begun to truly question things. She'd felt such a kindred connection to the quiet, odd Druid child. That Uther had been willing to kill him just because he was a druid or his father was one, was horrendous. That was why she'd helped him escape Camelot and hid him from her King. At least that was what she told herself. Now, under the still of the moon, Morgana was honest with herself. It was because she'd seen herself in the young boy. Frightened of what he might be and no one to turn to with his father murdered by the King.
Morgana truly believed that magic wasn't either evil or good, it was those that would wield its power. She hoped to keep her suspicions a secret but her nightmare gave lie to that. She knew that at some point it would become known that her nightmares were more than unconscious fears. If she were not to end up as her dream suggested, burned at the stake or head on the chopping block for 'crimes' against Camelot, Morgana would need to change Uther's mind. To get him to see that it wasn't magic but the sorcerer. To do that, Morgana needed to learn why he hated magic so much.
Over the years, she'd tried to get him to talk about it but he had refused. All that she knew, was that it had to do with his wife and Arthur's birth. Gaius also held the key and perhaps between her and Merlin they could learn the root of the hatred. Morgana knew that Merlin would help or at the very least be coerced into helping, for he had as much to lose as she did. Little pieces to a puzzle were falling into place for Morgana as she inspected her own life and the cause to her nightmares, so too was she examining the odd happenings that were surrounding Merlin's life. There were as many unexplained occurrences in his life as in hers and Morgana did not believe in coincidences. There were too many to explain away and while Merlin did a good job of it, she couldn't help but notice that he seemed to have as deep a connection to Mordred as she did.
A lightness settled over her heart as her mind finally was in agreement with her heart. Morgana no longer needed to hide her suspicions even from herself. She would have to tread carefully in the coming days, months and perhaps years but she was no novice when it came to court politics. Her path had been laid out before her with a possible outcome. It was up to her to change it. To make her own destiny and heed the warnings of her dream.
Author:
verdant_gtFandom: Merlin
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Prompt: #106: What people say, what people do, and what they say they do are entirely different things. -- Margaret Mead (1901-1978), American anthropologist.
Summary: Morgana reflects on her nightmares and what is the ultimate cause.
Author's Notes: Title is a quote from Anais Nin.
Word Count: 1,111
A scream rent the night air of Camelot Castle as Morgana was locked into another hellish nightmare. This time, it didn't involve Arthur but rather it involved Uther. The dream wasn't showing her death and destruction as was a usual fare. The images flipping through her mind's eye were of robed forms walking toward her with a finger outstretched and accusatory expressions on their faces. Uther was sitting on his throne with a look of disgust as he watched her approach. Her hands were bound in shackles as they had been that time when she openly defied him over Gwen's father, Tom.
"What have you to say for yourself, Morgana?" Uther asked when she approached. "You have been accused of sorcery and crimes against Camelot." His tone told her it was more crimes against him that she was there for.
Morgana frantically looked around her for a sympathetic face but there was none to be found. "I have never lied to you, Sire. Magic is not something one chooses to do. It is within you or it is not. It is the magic wielder and what they do with it that taints, not the magic itself."
"All theses years, Morgana." Uther stood from the throne. "All these years, I've treated you as a daughter. A daughter I never had and this is how you repay me? By never coming to me with this knowledge? By conspiring against your King and Camelot?"
"No, my Lord. Never. They were dreams. That's all they were. I have no control over them. I never knew they were magic until after I heard the dragon's call." Morgana knew that her fate was sealed. She could see it in Uther's eyes, she was already dead.
"Kill her." It was said dispassionately and with a careless toss of his hand.
Morgana began to scream and it was her own screaming that woke her up in a cold sweat. She glanced around her darkened chambers, heart beating frantically against her ribs as a bird trying to escape its cage. It was a dream. She flopped back against her pillow, sleep forever elusive to her once again. Was it something that will happen in the future or was it only her over active imagination? The guilt that she felt for keeping her dreams and fears to herself?
She lay there reliving the dream over and over again until she couldn't stand it any longer and got out of bed. Morgana quickly dressed in a simple gown and hooded cape making sure not to wake Gwen, her lady servant and friend, as she lay sleeping nearby. She quietly made her way out of the castle and down to the stables for a late night ride.
It was in the quiet of the night, under a clear moon, that Morgana searched her soul. Images of her father's death filled her mind. She'd never told a living soul but she'd seen her father's death before Uther had come to their home to tell her she was an orphan. She'd made him tell her details of how he'd died, sure in the knowledge that her dream had been nothing more than a young girl's soul crying at the moment her father's left this world. It hadn't been, of course, for no young girl would know the intimate details of war. No simple child could possibly know exactly how her father had left this Earth yet everything that Uther had said, had happened in her nightmare.
Suspicions had begun to take form when she grew older but Morgana had hid them away. Fear from Uther's distrust and hatred of magic being a prominent reason but also denial. As much as Morgana faced things head on, there were certain things that she refused to face. A chance of being different and magical was certainly high on that list.
It wasn't until Mordred came to Camelot that she'd begun to truly question things. She'd felt such a kindred connection to the quiet, odd Druid child. That Uther had been willing to kill him just because he was a druid or his father was one, was horrendous. That was why she'd helped him escape Camelot and hid him from her King. At least that was what she told herself. Now, under the still of the moon, Morgana was honest with herself. It was because she'd seen herself in the young boy. Frightened of what he might be and no one to turn to with his father murdered by the King.
Morgana truly believed that magic wasn't either evil or good, it was those that would wield its power. She hoped to keep her suspicions a secret but her nightmare gave lie to that. She knew that at some point it would become known that her nightmares were more than unconscious fears. If she were not to end up as her dream suggested, burned at the stake or head on the chopping block for 'crimes' against Camelot, Morgana would need to change Uther's mind. To get him to see that it wasn't magic but the sorcerer. To do that, Morgana needed to learn why he hated magic so much.
Over the years, she'd tried to get him to talk about it but he had refused. All that she knew, was that it had to do with his wife and Arthur's birth. Gaius also held the key and perhaps between her and Merlin they could learn the root of the hatred. Morgana knew that Merlin would help or at the very least be coerced into helping, for he had as much to lose as she did. Little pieces to a puzzle were falling into place for Morgana as she inspected her own life and the cause to her nightmares, so too was she examining the odd happenings that were surrounding Merlin's life. There were as many unexplained occurrences in his life as in hers and Morgana did not believe in coincidences. There were too many to explain away and while Merlin did a good job of it, she couldn't help but notice that he seemed to have as deep a connection to Mordred as she did.
A lightness settled over her heart as her mind finally was in agreement with her heart. Morgana no longer needed to hide her suspicions even from herself. She would have to tread carefully in the coming days, months and perhaps years but she was no novice when it came to court politics. Her path had been laid out before her with a possible outcome. It was up to her to change it. To make her own destiny and heed the warnings of her dream.