Four Grey Walls and Four Grey Towers, Marlene McKinnon, PG-13/R

[opheliet.livejournal.com]

Title: Four Grey Walls and Four Grey Towers

Author: opheliet
Fandom: Harry Potter

Rating: PG-13- light R

Warnings: Violence, death, torture, cursing, childbirth

Word Count: 3,829

Prompt: 17. That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment. -- Dorothy Parker.

Summary: The Order never knew what really happened to Marlene McKinnon. 

 

No DH spoilers.

Title taken from the poem The Lady of Shallot, by Alfred Tennyson.
One hundred million thanks to my betas, Katie, Cody, and Peretz. All remaining errors are mine.

Prompt sort of-maybe used, but not strictly adhered to. 

Somewhere, far away, thunder rumbles, but as Marlene leans her head against the ragged stone wall, she reminds herself that the noise is probably just in her imagination.

 

It is too unlikely that any kind of outside noise would be able to permeate through the thick stones or the many spells cast around the prison.

 

But it's nice to pretend, at least. Marlene has always loved storms, and thinking about rain pounding down onto the thirsty summer ground, or lightning streaking towards the earth in a sharp flash of light gives her a little bit of happiness.

 

She smiles a bit, then opens her eyes, looking around in the gloom. She can feel someone looking back, and holds out her hand to help whoever is stumbling towards her.

 

"Why are you still awake?" she murmurs, shifting so that Dorcas can sit down beside her.

"I can't sleep. I can't ever sleep in this shitehole, you know that." Dorcas sighs, her fingers massaging her steadily growing stomach. "Sorry, I just-" she trails off as one of the other prisoners stirs. When a few moments of silence pass, she speaks again, her voice barely a whisper. "It's just hard, y'know? I get antsy."

Marlene knows. She knows exactly what Dorcas means. They have been used to sixteen hour days working for the Order, barely resting before leaping out of bed at a moment's notice, fighting in rain, hail, lightning, and anything else thrown their way. To be restricted to a tiny, dingy prison cell with nothing to do but sit and wait to be interrogated again…it is driving them mad.

 

They think up stories. It helps, when the Death Eaters slam back the metal bars and grab one of them by the hair, the chosen victim for the day. While Crucio and every other curse imaginable are being inflicted upon them, halted only long enough for one Death Eater to hiss "What do you know?" into their ears, they tell stories.

It was Marlene's idea. She came back from a round of torturing one day and whispered a couple of sentences to Farren, the old wizened witch in the back of the cell. The next day when Farren returned, she passed the story along. And that is how they survive. They tell stories about witches fighting dragons, about goblins and wizards, and most importantly, about winning this war.

 

As time passes, it gets harder. Especially for Dorcas, who grows larger every day. Marlene tries not to worry about what is going to happen when her time comes. The floor is covered in filth, darkness fills every inch of the cell, there is no way a baby can be brought safely into this world. Her fears are reflected in Dorcas's eyes, but every time Marlene attempts to bring up the subject she simply smiles and rubs her stomach.

 

"It'll all work out somehow," she promises. "It just has to, y'know?"

The men avoid her, not wanting to get near her, and Dorcas is spared for a while. But Bellatrix shows no mercy and yanks Dorcas out one day, fire in her eyes as she insists in a low whisper that she is certain this one will tell them everything they want to know.

 

Dorcas returns one hour later, bruised, bleeding, and sobbing. The baby is kicking, though, and Marlene checks on her every fifteen minutes for the rest of the night, just to make sure everything's okay.

 

"I didn't tell them anything," Dorcas whispers once, so quietly Marlene almost doesn't hear her.

"What?"

 

"I didn't tell them anything. You know, anything important. I was quite proud of myself, actually."

 

Marlene smiles for the first time in weeks, and Dorcas actually laughs. They while away the hours until morning speaking in whispers about school and life before the war. For a little while, it seems like things are not really all that bad, not with the memories they cherish still firmly present in their minds.

 

The Death Eaters are obviously frustrated about the lack of information they are getting from their prisoners and Marlene wonders how much worse their imprisonment could possibly get.

Then the bastards begin to get personal.

 

They can only tell the time because in the morning scraps of food are thrown onto the floor before them and it's always afternoon when the Death Eaters choose to question them. And it's one afternoon that the little girl, Stella, who was kidnapped because her blood traitor father works at the Ministry, is seized by Mulciber.

 

"She doesn't even know anything!" Marlene shrieks, trying to keep her voice steady as the little girl's eyes widen in fear and she attempts to yank herself free from Mulciber's grip.

"Well then maybe you'd like to go in her place?" he says in an agonizingly calm voice, tossing Stella aside and Body-Binding Marlene before she can blink.

Marlene is dragged upstairs and thrown onto the floor face first, as the Charm is removed. Before she has a chance to move, however, she sees her mother standing right in front of her.

"Mum!" She swallows hard because she can't believe they caught her mother, can't believe they dragged her here, but her mum is smiling and nodding. Then Mrs. McKinnon's elegant face twists into an expression of agony and Marlene screams as pain shoots through her own body, twisting around every nerve, lighting every inch of her skin on fire. And as her mother falls to the ground Marlene is ready to give them anything, anything and then from somewhere way in the back of her mind it clicks and she remembers-

 

Her mother's dead already.

 

She squeezes her eyes shut and bites her lip until it's bleeding but refuses to utter another sound. Finally Avery and Mulciber give up and she's allowed to return to the cell, where Dorcas wraps her tightly in the one dirty, ragged blanket they all share.

 

That night Marlene dreams about the day they attacked her house.

 

She runs into the kitchen and her mother is lying on the floor, her limbs twisted in odd ways, her eyes blank. Beside her are Marlene's twin sisters, their hands clasped together and blood trickling from gashes on their tiny bodies. She doesn't want to think about her father and brother, but knows they have met the same fate. She raises her wand to contact the Order, but hears a deep voice behind her shout "Stupefy!" and does not awake until she is in the prison. The first thing she sees when she opens her eyes is the Daily Prophet beside her, turned to her own obituary, and she gets sick.

 

The baby comes in the middle of the night, and they must be going through a cold spell because it's freezing.

 

Dorcas grips Marlene's hand from out of the darkness and she doesn't have to speak, Marlene just knows. She breathes out reassuring words and wakes Farren, and they try to make it comfortable for Dorcas. There's only so much they can do with one blanket and a stone floor, but they do what they can.

Marlene doesn't begin to worry until Dorcas screams out in pain. If they are found, there is no telling what the Death Eaters will do.

Farren is across the room in moments and holding Dorcas's hand in her own wrinkled one.

"Now, now dear, you bite down on this." She reaches up and in her hand is a piece of her wand, a shard that fell when the Death Eaters snapped it.

 

Marlene silently prays that it will be a fast labor, for all of their sakes. The sweat stands out on Dorcas's forehead as she mutters apologies and tries not to scream.

 

There's blood everywhere and in the back Stella is crying softly, trying not to whimper.

 

"She'll be all right," Marlene reassures the girl over her shoulder. "I promise, the baby will be here soon."

"You think?" Dorcas manages to say with just a touch of sarcasm before collapsing onto the stone again. "I think he wants to stay in here forever." Her body tightens against the next contraction but Marlene doesn't think the baby is any closer to coming out.

Hours pass, and Dorcas is tired. Stella has crawled across the cell and is now holding her hand, whispering a story to her while Farren and Marlene talk in whispers. Marlene pauses to watch the scene, the little girl stroking Dorcas's hand and wiping her forehead as she recites an old tale. But Farren's hand on her shoulder shakes her back to reality.

"I think there's something wrong," Marlene says. "She's no closer to having him now than she was three hours ago."

 

Farren nods. "Aye, there's something wrong. We just need more time." She breathes deeply, trying to think. Marlene nods, biting her lip because she knows time is one thing that's impossible to get.

"If we can keep her calm enough, I think we just may stand a chance. Come on now missy, let's give it a try, shall we? Just like I used to do. I had seven children with no midwife or Mediwizard, I think we can have a little tiny baby now, don't you think?"

 

Marlene laughs, and it feels foreign on her lips.

"Let's give it a try then."

 

She takes a deep breath and walks back to Dorcas, who is shaking and drenched in sweat. Stella is still telling her a story, rhythmically letting the words fall into the silence.

"All right Dorcas, we're going to get through this." Marlene forces herself to believe it. She lets Stella's quiet, serene voice steady her, and then counts for Dorcas before instructing her to push.

The baby comes out feet-first, with a rush of magic, a healthy cry and pink skin.

"He's beautiful," Marlene whispers, as she cuts the umbilical cord with Stella's laces and wraps the infant tightly in the ragged blanket. Dorcas holds him closely and breathes a sigh of relief, finally letting a few tears fall.

Their worries are far from over, but they clean up Dorcas as best as they can and Marlene sits back against the wall. A small figure creeps beside her and Marlene smiles as Stella rests her head sleepily on Marlene's lap. Absentmindedly running a hand through the girl's hair Marlene falls into a dazed sleep, exhausted and just a little bit more hopeful than she's dared to be before.

 

The Death Eaters don't come the next day, for whatever reason, and Marlene thanks whatever god was listening to her prayers.

 

"What'll you be naming him, dear?" Farren asks, smiling as Dorcas rocks the baby back and forth.

 

"I don't know," she replies, returning the smile. "Before I got tossed in this shitehole, we had decided on Alexander."

 

"Beautiful, dear. That's a good strong name." Farren sits back and Stella scurries into her lap as they watch the baby sleep.

 

The Death Eaters come at night, catching them all off guard. In a wave of black cloaks they swarm to the prison cell, and Marlene recognizes Bellatrix's laughter and Dolohov's curses shooting through the bars.

"Take the baby," Bellatrix says, barely able to keep the giddiness out of her voice. "Bring it upstairs."

Instinctively, they all stand around Dorcas, encircling her protectively. Even little Stella stands fixedly in front, arms crossed and jaw set.

"Oh, what's this one going to do?" Bellatrix laughs, opening the cell door and coming inside. "Are you going to fight me, little one?" She pulls out her wand and raises it.

"You will not touch the child." Farren steps forward, her voice strong.

"Oh, the old biddy is going to protect them all. And what are you going to do, eh?"

Marlene is ready to kill them all if they come anywhere near that baby, and the determination in Dorcas's eyes says she'll do the same thing.

 

"We could take them together, yeah?" she whispers and Dorcas nods.

"Oh, definitely. These odds? It'll be easy."

 

Marlene is ready, she will do whatever it takes because this place is hell, but it's her home for now, and she's going to protect these people who have become like family, even if she couldn't protect her own.

 

Bellatrix holds up a hand and stays the advancing Death Eaters. Her smile tells of an idea, and Marlene's stomach lurches.

 

Farren stands with her head held high and doesn't utter a sound while they fire their curses, one right after the other, so quickly the colours blur together. Marlene has to hold Stella back as she screams and kicks, tears streaming down her face. The noise wakes the baby, who wails because he senses their fear, but no one can take their eyes from Farren. She is standing proudly, staring at the Death Eaters with a look of disgust on her face, and for a second Marlene believes she is invincible.

The old woman loses her footing and falls at last, her light blue eyes seeing no more, and Marlene feels a weight plunge into her, knocking the air out of her lungs. An anger she didn't know she had flares up in her but she doesn't speak, doesn't give them the satisfaction. As the Death Eaters drag her body out of the cell one of the Death Eaters is suddenly slammed against the bars, knocking him unconscious. Marlene turns and looks at Stella, who is standing in the corner, her cheeks flushed in anger, and feels a stab of pride for the young girl.

The Death Eaters leave them to wonder, like ants scurrying under a magnifying glass, and Marlene racks her brain trying to figure out what to do. She worries herself frantic for much of the next day and night. But there must be something going on more important than prisoners, because the Death Eaters come only to feed them for the next few days.

 

Marlene sits up for the next couple of nights, hoping that something will happen to protect the fragile new baby, because she can't think of anything.

 

Dorcas gets a fever.

 

It's freezing in their prison but her skin is scorching hot and she slips in and out of delirium for much of the night.

 

Marlene holds Alexander as Stella tries to care for Dorcas, but by the time dawn breaks it is clear there is nothing more they can do.

 

Dorcas holds out her hands, and Marlene hands her the baby, and she kisses him gently, her hands shaking.

"We could still take them," Dorcas whispers, her eyes glassy and her breath ragged. "You know…just like Moody taught us." She isn't making sense and Marlene chokes back a sob as she takes the baby and Dorcas's eyes close. She keeps shaking uncontrollably and when the Death Eaters come Dolohov steps forward with a grin and says the Dark Lord has special plans for Dorcas.

"She'll be a good example for your precious Order," he sneers, and Dorcas is gone before Marlene gets a chance to move.

 

Marlene does not speak for three days. Even when she is taken for questioning- and she notices the Death Eaters are much less patient and much more demanding now, which can only be good for the Order's side- she refuses to speak at all.

At night she dreams of her family and of Dorcas and when Alexander wakes wailing she has nothing to give him, she simply holds him and rocks him back and forth.

 

The days begin to blend, and she can no longer tell the difference between day and night. Bellatrix bursts in once and snatches the baby from Marlene's fingers. Marlene screams and fights but there is Crucio after Crucio and she can't hold onto the little boy anymore.

 

Marlene just tries to stay sane.

 

Stella is crying one night and Marlene holds her close, but in the morning she is still shaking and sobbing and as Marlene looks into her eyes she knows the little girl has lost all hope.

"Want to hear a story?" Marlene whispers, and Stella nods, her wide green eyes getting just the faintest spark in them.

So Marlene talks. She puts one word in front of the other, just to try to make some sort of sense for the girl, to keep her here because Marlene doesn't want to be alone, and it's selfish but she wraps her arms tighter around Stella's thin little body because she thinks if she does maybe she'll be able to keep her here just a little longer.

 

It is many days later, or maybe it just feels like it, when the Death Eaters burst into the cell, don't even bother dragging Marlene upstairs, and force her upright.

 

Marlene stands, and she faces them with a kind of purpose she didn't know she possessed. Stella is sleeping soundly behind her, and Marlene takes a deep breath.

"He grows impatient," Bellatrix says, and there is anger in her voice. Marlene knows the woman has been reprimanded, and smiles.

"Does he? I suppose he would grow impatient, waiting for information that he's not going to get. Long wait there."

"You insolent little-" Bellatrix's wand finishes her sentence with purple light that burns fire through Marlene's body, searing her throat, her stomach, every inch of her.

"Are you going to kill me?" Marlene asks, her voice hoarse and cracked. "Honestly, Bellatrix, try for an easier target, would you?"

 

They offer her everything- they say they'll set her free, they'll give her the baby back (Marlene doesn't even believe he's alive), they'll give her anything and everything she could ever want if only she'll tell them what they want to know. It's hardly tempting, and Marlene spits into their faces.

 

"I'd rather die here than tell you anything," she says very matter-of-factly.

"Careful what you wish for," Dolohov says with a smile, and they return back upstairs, whispering fiercely to one another.

 

They visit every couple of hours, making sure Marlene cannot sleep. They stop giving her food; they curse her for no reason. When she still won't talk, they threaten to take Stella away, and Marlene tells them to go fuck themselves sideways. Bellatrix grabs Stella's arm once and the little girl bites her so hard it breaks the skin.

 

They curse the little warrior unconscious, but leave her alone after that.

 

There is no food at all for days. Marlene knows what this must mean, but doesn't tell Stella, who spends most of the time asleep now anyway.

 

It is hardest when the little girl goes. Marlene goes to check on her once, and her soft eyes flutter open. She smiles, a grin almost too big for her face, and grabs Marlene's hand.

 

"Tell me a story," she whispers, and Marlene chokes out the beginning of something her mother used to tell her. She can barely get the words out but it doesn't look like Stella is listening anyway.

 

"You're good at telling stories," she whispers softly, a small smile still on her face as she closes her eyes. Moments later her face relaxes and her hand falls slack.

Marlene is out of tears and can only stare at the wall, because she isn't sure what she is going to do next. She feels numb and cold and hungry and absolutely hopeless.

 

The next time they come, they do not ask questions. There is a happiness in Bellatrix's eyes that can only mean one thing. Marlene tucks the blanket around Stella's body and turns, nearly passing out with the effort.

 

Bellatrix and a Death Eater Marlene does not recognize enter the cell, and they simply smile as they talk to each other, obviously trying to frighten Marlene. She does not care. Of all the emotions she is feeling, fear is not among them, and she cannot find the energy to care about Bellatrix, her wand, or the spell she knows is coming. Stella was her last concern, and when the girl went, any hold the Death Eaters had over her disappeared.

 

"Well girly, you can tell us what you know, or we have orders to kill you. One last chance." Bellatrix giggles, twirling her wand around and around.

 

Marlene simply blinks as though she cannot comprehend what they are saying, then smiles and shakes her head. Bellatrix shrieks, infuriated, and raises her wand. Marlene stares and tries to register what is happening.

 

But it is different now. Marlene stands up straight, facing the wand that will surely bring about her death, and for the first time she can see the dirt smudged on Bellatrix's face. The room is lighter, and warmer at that, and Marlene thinks that if this is dying then it's not really so bad at all.

She feels a hand slip into hers and sees Stella, but that's impossible because Stella is sleeping and Dorcas is dead so how can she be here, and she saw Farren fall so why is the old woman smiling beside Dorcas?

Marlene swallows and opens her mouth to speak but doesn't have words to say because for the first time she's enveloped in warmth as she stares at Bellatrix, looks into the eyes of the woman who is so eager to end her life, and smiles serenely as she feels Dorcas's hand slip into her own, giving her strength. And it doesn't really matter how or why or if she's just imagining, because it feels real, and that's good enough for Marlene.

And together they stand, facing one of their own who is only too glad to finish them all, and Marlene knows, though she doesn't understand how, that it will be okay, in the end. She knows it's impossible, can't fathom how they will defeat him, but she knows that they will. They have to. She does not know the answer, but it doesn't matter because it's right there in front of her. They are going to win. And a feeling that Marlene hasn't felt in a long time explodes within her, and it takes her a long time to figure out what it is. A mixture of pride, of love, and maybe even pity rush up, and Marlene doesn't hurt, doesn't feel anything except happy and safe.

Bellatrix smiles as she raises her wand, expecting pleas of mercy and screams of desperation. But Marlene simply holds up her head and watches like a curious child.

 

"Your last words, McKinnon?" she asks with a sneer.

"Oh Bellatrix, I would love to be the one to finish you off, but just know that when the lucky person does, wherever I am, I will be celebrating."

 

"I bet you will," she scowls, and slashes her wand through the air. Marlene holds her breath and shuts her eyes, but feels hands gripping hers, tightly, reassuringly, she feels warmth that is safety and feels more hope now than she has in a long time.

The light explodes from Bella's wand, filling the room, and Marlene McKinnon dies smiling.

 

Comments

[opheliet.livejournal.com]

Thank you so very much! I'm really pleased you thought the ending was good, it was one of the things I struggled with the most with this fic. Those characters Moody shows in that picture have always interested me, because there's little doubt in my mind they had stories just as heart-wrenching as the major characters in canon. Anyway, thank you for your very kind words! :)